Posted by: laughs4dads | February 22, 2010

The Father of Our Country

Since today is George Washington’s real birthday, and this is a blog about fathers, I thought it would be appropriate to write about the Father of Our Country.

George Washington was a great general.  George Washington was a great president.  George Washington accomplished many great things in his 67 years of life.

And do you know why George Washington accomplished so much?  That’s right.  He had no children. At least not with his wife.  There were Martha’s two kids from a previous marriage, but they were either dead or grown up by the time George started doing all that really great stuff.

Although Martha was a fine-looking woman except for a few extra chins and a pelican-like pouch on her neck, Washington may have gotten all Tiger Woodsy with the slaves and had children with them.  But those are just rumors, and he never lost any endorsement deals because of it (he is still the spokesman for some products of the US Mint, and a very nice bridge), and those children were never hanging around going “Daddy, can you stop picking a place for the national seat of government and play with us?” 

So what kind of father was George Washington?  Well, he shall be judged in that regard as all fathers are: by how their kid turned out.

Washington’s kid is spoiled, whiny and prone to violence.  Also, she’s not very popular in some of the circles in which she travels.

On the other hand, she is very successful, and has outlived many of her contemporaries.  She also managed to patch things up with her childhood enemy, with whom she was constantly bickering in her early years.

She is most famous for her values, for which Washington can take some of the credit.   And hopefully, George instilled in her the strength to fight off those who would pervert those values for their own gain.

All in all, not a bad job, George.  Happy birthday.


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